Gallucks’s Boyfriend

Gallucks’s Boyfriend

Photography by Tom Buck

What I’m Wearing

Oversized Coat – MISBHV (click here)

Thunderdome Hoodie – MISBHV (click here)

Tracksuit Bottoms – Reserved (click here)

Triple S Sneakers – Balenciaga (click here)

It’s funny because when you type ‘Gallucks’ into google – ‘Gallucks Boyfriend’ is one of the first suggested things to come up. So I thought I’d give the search term some context and all those nosey lurkers something to actually read. I don’t think I’ve ever read any dating advice from a male fashion blogger except maybe Byranboy but I wouldn’t really call ‘Douching 101’ dating advice lol (no shade Bryan). Yes I’m here because of my love for personal style, clothing, fashion etc and that’s what I like to talk about but I guess humans are naturally interested in peoples personal lives, connections and relationships, don’t get me wrong I am too. I’m sure we can all be a little bit nosey from time to time. I thought I’d sit down and write a new blog post (finally) on a more of a personal level, so I guess you can carry on scrolling if you’d like to get to know me a little bit more.

Here on my blog, on Instagram and on YouTube I like to share my outfits and discuss style with you guys, I feel like we’re a group of mates and each and every one of you guys is important to me. I’ve never actually shied away from talking about relationships or my personal life here on the internet. In fact if you’ve been reading for a very long time you can see a couple of my ex’s in past blog posts, vlogs, I often used to mention my previous partners all the time when I was with them but I never made a song and dance about it, I never made a ‘coming out’ video or anything like that because I didn’t feel the need to.

I never even technically ‘came out’ to my Mum because – I just am who I am, It wasn’t a change or a ‘new’ thing so in my eyes everything was the same? I spoke about this in my Mental Health Day Video over on my YouTube Channel – In fact the only way that I was 100% sure that I liked guys myself was when I was with my first boyfriend. I’d had girlfriends in the past but I was just never that bothered about them (sorry Joanne if you’re reading this haha – side note Joanne is now my best friend so it’s all good). So when I was in a meaningful relationship with another guy I just I introduced him to my mum and my stepdad as my boyfriend and that was it. Anyone that was willing to treat me differently or have their opinion of me changed because of my natural 100% self could sling a hook. I don’t need any negativity in my life, no one does. (cont.)

So when it comes to blogging, youtubing etc my partners and sexual preference – although they’re a huge part of my life I never felt like there was a need to talk about my personal life in videos or on my blog – until now apparently haha. As of May this year I became single, after being in and out of relationships for 5/6 years of my life – I’d never really spent any time alone or been ‘single’. I think the most difficult bit for me was that I didn’t really know how to be single. I’m very loyal, I liked being in relationships, I guess I felt safe? More in control. However being single nowadays is extremely different to when I was last single haha.

Dating Apps

Tinder, Bumble, Happn, Chappy, Grindr not to mention countless others that I probably haven’t tried yet – there are ridiculous amount of dating apps now and they’re so cut throat – especially here in London in the ‘gay’ section of them all. More often than not you see the same faces but on different apps, each profile slightly more in tune with the app itself.

You’ll see a charming guy in a suit on Chappy with a bio about how he’s looking for someone to argue over christmas decorations with – then we flip to the upside down (stranger things reference) you’ll find him on his Grindr profile where he’s shirtless, labelled himself as a Power Top with a tag line of ‘NO FAT, NO FEMS’. It’s a very confusing digital dating space and I prefer to speak less on apps and meet in real life.

I have friends who’ve met their other halves on Tinder, straight couples and gay couples so I know that there definitely is a chance of meeting the right person on these things I just think you have to be fully ready yourself and I’m in no position to jump into another long term relationship anytime soon.

Dating My Job

So most guys don’t understand what I do, tbh a lot of people don’t understand what I do or how the hell I’ve made such a successful career out of it. I’m not sure whether it’s a turn on or off moment for people, I put so much of myself online in videos and pictures that it’s hard for me to switch off sometimes. My job definitely had parts to play in the breakdown of my previous relationship which is a shame. However it did make me realise that I need to be with someone who fully supports my career, champions me as their partner and is proud to be with me and that goes for anyone in any walk of life, career, etc. You and your partner should make each other happy and offer support to help each other right? So I guess if they’re not hot on my career from the get go then that’s a good warning sign. Nobody wants to be with a debbie downer or an unsupportive partner eg. Nate from The Devil Wears Prada.

Fickle Friends

One thing that is really odd and strange to see and I’m seeing it now more than ever, not just with dating but even with people I meet is the way someones attitude towards me can change when they find out how many followers I have on Instagram. It makes my heart sink and really shows some peoples true colours. I for one couldn’t give two hoots about how many followers somebody has. I don’t even care about what other people are wearing. A Few of the dates that I’ve been on guys have been like ‘ oh I wasn’t sure what to wear because you’re a fashion blogger’ and I never really know what to say but I just say don’t worry I don’t judge anyone by their outfit. I’m not one to toot my own horn but I’m really proud of the community that I’ve built over the last 7 years however that does not mean I want people to be nice to me or to go on a date with me just because I have a fair few followers on social media – that’s not ok and I can see right through those kinds of attitudes.

Happy By Yourself

I think something that me and a lot of my friends have been saying is that you won’t ever really be ready to meet someone and when you do it sort or just happens. You might go on 50 dates through a dating app but then bump into someone on the street one day and find that it just clicks – but one thing that you can do is learn to be happy by yourself. I’m a very generous and kind person, especially when it comes to relationships, I’m the sort of guy who would do anything for the person I’m with so now I have to channel that energy into making me happy.

Concentrate on you, your career, your own goals, improving your own life, that’s what I’ve been telling myself. Something that I’ve always talked about here on my blog and thats being your own boss. Like I referenced earlier, I liked being in a relationship because of the control – well guess what?  My life is the only thing that I’m actually in control of so that’s what I have to do now. Look after myself and then anyone that I happen to meet along the way will just be a bonus.

So I guess in summary , through all the rambling and the dating talk, whilst feeling extremely ‘me me me’ (although I guess it is my blog) what I’ve been trying to say is

  • I don’t have a boyfriend.
  • I’m learning how to be single.
  • Dating apps are a confusing minefield.
  • I’m avoiding social climbers.
  • I’m looking out for myself for a change.

I hope no one that I’m currently dating reads this or they’re going to freak the hell out haha I hope that you enjoyed reading this post, do let me know what you think in the comment section below or if you’d rather message me privately you can do that too.

5 Comments

  1. 28/10/2017 / 19:06

    Glad to hear your focussing on yourself and trying to make yourself happy Joel! 🙂 Very well written and love the outfit as always. x

  2. 29/10/2017 / 05:13

    I like the way you approached publicizing your sexuality, by not distinctly declaring it and simply embracing it as the norm.

    If you’re having a hard time being single, I’d suggesting surrounding yourself with people you enjoy more and/or occupying your time with something new (e.g. a class, working out, or me lol).

  3. 31/10/2017 / 09:25

    I have to agree with Kevin on how you approached publicizing your sexuality. I think that’s actually the best way to do it since it doesn’t look like you’re bearing a huge burden on your shoulders by the needs of ‘coming out’.

    Next to that, I want to add another thing to Kevin’s suggestion. I have been single my whole life and I’ve never been bothered by until actually recently since all of my friends are having boyfriends and I’m left alone . But that’s my problem . Anyways, just keep yourself busy, that way the single life won’t affect you since you’re always busy with something so that you don’t even have the time to think about being single, hahaha. Or you can always look for you , lol.

  4. 07/11/2017 / 17:29

    Cool post. I guess it makes sense to learn to be happy single. I’ve heard a quote something along the lines of you have to know how to love yourself before you can love anyone else. For the most part I think that’s true. You’re right dating apps are confusing! I’ve known people who met long term relationships on them, but in my case I met both of my long term relationships in person. One at a party, and one at work.

  5. 13/11/2017 / 14:43

    Don’t bother with all the chit-chat dude… People will talk there is not so much you can do on that. Whatever a person chooses or decised is no one else’s business. So just flex, embrace and share more style tips and brands bruh.

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